The gritty truth about the cost of comfort.
Recently, my family of five enjoyed a gorgeous day on the beach. Feeling more like a May than January, the wildflowers in full bloom along HWY 1 on the coast of California, we drove south and let the kids boogie board down the sand dunes.
When it was time to leave, my six-year-old son was unhappy about the “gross” sand that was stuck to his hands and feet.
“The beach is icky! I’m all dirty!” He whined as he moved at a snail’s pace while I struggled through the sand myself with my arms full of toys, towels, and boogie boards.
I understood his complaint in that moment. The grit between my own toes was rubbing against my sandals and I was dreading the chore of dusting the sand off of myself and three kids once we reached the car. But I heard myself saying “Wasn’t this a great day though? The fun is worth the mess sometimes!”
I realized in that moment how mess averse I am. A hermit by nature, I prefer to keep my days as comfortable and calm as possible. Never much of a “joiner”—I get easily frustrated with complicated processes or inefficiencies. Bureaucratic systems make me crazy. I want to pull my hair out over arbitrary rules, red tape, or when there are too many cooks in the kitchen. Suffice to say, it’s no surprise I’m attracted to independent work.
But it took COVID lockdowns and the aftermath to help me see that, as a society, we’ve become so attached to our own comfort and preferences we’ve forgotten that these “annoyances” also come with major upsides.
Prioritizing comfort over community may help us feel safe, but it also keeps us isolated.
The truth is: People are messy. Relationships are messy. Work is messy. Kids are messy.
Life. Is. Messy.
When you’re really in it, you may get sand in your teeth and blisters on your feet.
But the alternative is never experiencing the wind kissing your hair. Or the crashing of the waves coming in to pull your worries out to sea. You’d miss the smile on the kids’ faces as they play tag with the freezing tides.
Sometimes we have to embrace the mess to enjoy the beauty.
Here’s to letting it be messy,
Kristina
